


this ideal we’ve made, it's just you and me

by MatildaSwan



Category: Holby City
Genre: Berena Appreciation Week, F/F, Sex in a Car, smut and angst and hugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-15
Updated: 2018-08-15
Packaged: 2019-06-27 19:06:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15691551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MatildaSwan/pseuds/MatildaSwan
Summary: Serena has been waiting for an opportunity like this for longer than she cares to admit.But, of course, they still have much to discuss, not all of it good, which might damped the mood.~Set immediately after 20x25Primum Non Nocere (II)





	this ideal we’ve made, it's just you and me

Bernie is still smiling as they reach the edge of the car park.

Serena’s brow, however, creases with concentration before easing them into early evening traffic, driving into the night to leave the hospital behind them.

She takes a left, and then a right. The wrong way.

Bernie barely notices, too busy stealing glances at Serena out of the corner of her eye, too busy trying her best to hold back a blinding smile so Serena can keep her eyes on the road.

They have plans for tonight; she won’t have them derailed by something silly like driving off the road and ending up in a ditch.

She gets lost, for a moment, in fantasies of what’s waiting for them when they get home; what she has planned for Serena, what Serena might have planned for her.

It takes her a while to realise they must have taken a wrong turn, and then another one more. Because she doesn’t recognise anything much outside the window, just that the neighbourhood doesn’t look at all like Serena’s, or even Bernie’s old flat.

The smile slips from her lips as she scrunches up her nose in confusion. Turns to Serena, frowning, only to find her looking completely nonplussed, as if everything is business as usual.

Bernie wonders if it’s just her bearings that are the problem, until she spots the tiniest hint of a smirk sitting pretty in the corner of Serena’s mouth.

They turn one more corner and start a steady climb up an obtuse hill; they crest and Bernie gets a glimpse of all of Wyvern, city lights glittering in the twilight, and everything clicks into place.

‘You minx,’ Bernie chuckles, as the car comes to a stop overlooking make out point.

‘I try my hardest,’ Serena says, low and promising, ‘I’m not sure I can wait till I get you home.’ Bernie nods despite herself, gravitating towards Serena as she unbuckles her belt and turns her torso towards Bernie, arm slouching against the wheel while her eyes shine with promise. ‘So,’ she starts, voice rough, as she raises an eyebrow. ‘You game?’

A shiver runs up Bernie’s spine, rippling out right through her. She bites back a whimper, manages a tiny nod, and that’s all it takes to entice Serena to cross the space between them and kiss her hungrily. 

Bernie grunts as Serena presses up against the window, barely notices the cold against her back as she struggles out of her coat, eager hands helping to help to push it off her shoulders, pull it under her bum, drop it onto the car floor.

She’s missed this, so much; everything she’s been thinking of, dreaming about, for months of separation.

She knows what it’ll be like, this time; it’ll be easier, now she knows what to expect.  

She also knows to welcome opportunities when they present themselves: jumper rucked up around her waist and the button of her trousers popped open. She starts praying, almost begging, whimpering against Serena’s lips.

‘Oh, _Bernie_ ,’ Serena whispers as she slips past her knickers, drags the tip of her finger through slick wetness. ‘I’ve missed you.’

It’s all Bernie can do not to cry, as she tries to spread her legs wider and welcome Serena’s hand between her thighs.

But her trousers are tighter then she remembers and the passenger seat seems smaller, somehow. Or maybe her legs are longer than they were the last time she and Serena were together?

Whatever the reason, she can’t quite manage it, to make herself comfortable and sink into the feeling of Serena’s fingers sliding over her vulva.

‘Serena, please,’ she begs, rutting up into her hand.

Serena, too, struggles against the confines of the car: shifting forwards and back as she teases over Bernie’s minora, trying to shuffle closer while avoiding parts of the car, grunting when her knee hits the hand break.

‘I’m trying, my love,’ she huffs against Bernie’s lips, trying to wrangle them into a better position. ‘I just need too—’

Her hip hits the steering wheel and the horn blares.

They spring apart, panting in the quiet of the car. Catch each other’s eyes, all kiss bruised and hair a mess, and burst out laughing.

‘Right, this isn’t working.’ Serena huffs, once she’s caught her breath again, pulling her hand out of Bernie’s pants.

Bernie misses it already, but knows Serena is right. Settles back into the passenger seat, making a vague attempt at smoothing down her sweater, only a little put out about not getting off.

‘Well then, drive on.’

‘Not a chance,’ Serena quips, struggling out of her coat and rising up to kneel on the front seat, bracing herself on the dashboard and the headrest of Bernie’s seat. She leans forward to steal a quick kiss before hefting herself up and through the gap between the seats, twisting to plonk herself down on her arse with a huff and pull her legs along behind her.

She settles in the backseat, happy as she pleases, and looks pointedly at Bernie.

‘Well?’ she says expectantly. ‘Come on then.’ She offers out a hand, presumably to help, while Bernie gapes slightly, eyes sparkling with laughing still bubbling up her throat.

She jumps into the backseat: a little clumsy, a touch frantic. Trips over her trousers, still wrapped around her thighs. Traps her ankles and falls onto Serena with a soft, ‘oofph.’

Serena takes her weight gladly, giggling gently as she slowly guides Bernie into her lap, laughing between quick, bruising kisses.

‘Should have used the doors,’ Bernie thinks out loud between kisses, moaning as Serena nips at her neck. ‘Would have been easier.’

Serena snorts. ‘Good luck walking all that way with your knickers around your knees.’

She takes Bernie’s answering pout as an invitation to bite gently at her bottom lip. Shifts her hips and presses Bernie onto her thigh.

Bernie whimpers, eyes fluttering closed a Serena’s fingers bite into her hips, and starts to rock gently.

‘That’s it, good girl,’ Serena whispers in her ear, Bernie clinging to her shoulders. ‘God, how I’ve missed you.’

Bernie falls forward, rests her forehead against Serena’s. ‘So good, missed this, so much.’

Serena moans, delighted. Shifts a little, presses Bernie’s down harder. Bites back a groan as Bernie’s mouth falls to her neck, hot breath ghosting over her shoulder.

‘Good, because this is just the beginning,’ she says, voice low and silken. ‘Just wait till we get home and I can take my time with you.’

Bernie answers with a grunt. ‘Yes, _yes_.’

Serena smirks. ‘But first, you’re going to come for me, aren’t you Bernie? Right here, in your pants, in the back of the car. Where anyone walking past can see you.’    

It shouldn’t work, not with their position—cramped and awkward and a danger to their joints; neither as limber as they used to be, both likely covered in bruises come morning—but it does, as Bernie nods vigorously, moving quicker, her knee hard against Serena too, the buckle in the small of her back, whimpers and soft whispers filling the car.

Then Bernie cries out sharply, knee pressed against the crux of Serena’s thighs; the seam sitting against her clit, just so.

The sight of Bernie’s head thrown back and all that lovely long neck exposed while her moans fill the car brings Serena close to the edge. But it’s Bernie’s bliss filled eyes falling back on as she catches her breath, the radiant smile as she says, ‘I love you’ that tips Serena over the edge.

She comes with a low moan that echoes around the enclosure of the car, humming as Bernie falls softly against her chest, mouth grazing her neck while they both relax into the afterglow.

She slips her arms around Bernie to pull her closer, legs still tangled as they lay half undressed, panting gently in the backseat of the car. Strokes a hand up and down Bernie’s back, looking out the window to notice just how fogged up they’ve become.

‘Well,’ Bernie says, sitting back on her haunches some minutes later, breaking the silence. ‘That was certainly something.’

‘I know,’ Serena agrees, a light in her eyes that brings a blush to Bernie’s cheeks. ‘I can’t wait to do it again.’

Bernie huffs out a breath, Serena smiles coyly; they both snort before chuckling softly, low and rich and rumbling through their whole bodies.

Serena draws Bernie back into for another hug, wraps her arms tight around her back again, Bernie shaking as she giggles in Serena’s arms.

Or so she thinks. Till something hot and wet falls into the crook of her neck.

‘Bernie?’ Serena asks, voice soft with concern as she realises that Bernie is crying softly, shoulders shaking as she bites back a sniffle. Serena pushes her shoulders back gently, a finger under her chin to make eye contact. ‘Darling, what is it?’

Then, Bernie smiles, wet and relieved.

‘I’ve missed you, so much,’ she confesses, eyes sparkling as she smiles a little brighter.

Serena reaches up to cup Bernie’s face in her hands. ‘I’ve missed you too,’ she whispers against her lips, before kissing her, soft and sweet.

Bernie hums happily when Serena finally draws back, eyes still closed as if savouring the tingle of kiss bruised lips.

Serena gazes at her, the picture of contentment, until lines start to form on Bernie forehead, furrowing her brow. She frowns herself, a question, as Bernie opens her eyes and stares right at Serena, eyes wide and a little horrified.

‘I can’t believe you finished with me.’

The anguish in Bernie’s voice is palpable, and realisation hits Serena right in the gut.

She rushes white-hot and burning.

‘Well, you’re the one who just _left_ ,’ she splutters, indignantly, trying to find her voice again. Trying to gather up some ground to stand on.

Bernie purses her lips, eyebrows high and hidden under her fringe, and glares at Serena. ‘You told me to!’

All the fight in Serena leaves her in one heavy sigh. ‘Yes, I know,’ she says meekly, reaching out place her palm on the back of Bernie’s hand, to tangle their fingers together after Bernie pauses for a moment, nibbling on her bottom lip, before turning her hand right side up to accept the embrace.

Serena watches as Bernie strokes her thumb over the metacarpophalangeal joint. Tears begin to burn at the backs of her eyes.

‘I didn’t mean it, not really,’ she admits, watching Bernie’s thumb soothe circles over the skin of her hand. ‘I mean, I know I said it was the only thing to do, but…I didn’t really think about what it would _mean_.’ She looks up to find Bernie a little blurry. ‘That you wouldn’t be there in the future.’ She sucks in a shaky breath and whispers, ‘That you’d never be there with me again.’

The possibility, now she actually thinks about, is unfathomable. She truly can’t imagine a life without Bernie in it—nor does she want to—but that’s exactly what she did to them, to _Bernie,_ if only for a few minutes. ‘I’m so sorry, I—’

Bernie smoothes a hand over Serena’s shoulder, smiling soft and comforting, and pulls her close. ‘It’s okay, Serena, I’m here,’ she reminds her, voice as wet as her eyes. ‘We’re going to be alright. 

She can see through the windows again by the time they disentangle from each other to rummage around for a packet of tissues.

Serena waits patiently for Bernie to dry the last of her tears before leaning forward to steal a quick kiss, just because she can. It’s still a little salty, and she searches for something to lighten the mood.

‘Really, I don’t know what I was worried about, it’s not like you ever listen to anything I say,’ she says with a gentle laugh.

‘I listen!’ Bernie insists, a little affronted, voice laced with just a hint of a whine.

Serena raises an eyebrow.  

‘I do. Quite a lot, actually.’ The beginnings of a pout become a smirk as she shrugs just a little. ‘I just don’t always do what I’m told.’

Serena snorts affectionately, eyes softening at Bernie’s chagrin smile and coy eyes peeking out from beneath her fringe.

Realises there’s somewhere else she’d much rather be. Right now.

‘Well I’ll tell you what to do,’ Serena threatens, voice dropping low again. Bernie shivers in the warmth of the car. ‘Get out of my lap and get your seatbelt on. We’ve got work to do at home.’

Bernie jumps to with a cheeky, ‘Yes, ma’am!’

Serena slips out of the car and into the driver’s seat, takes one look behind her and smiles at Bernie in the backseat, apparently happy to sit there with in her post coital glow with her trousers undone.

Bernie beams back.

 _‘Drive_ _._ ’


End file.
